Adoption is a miracle.  Turning tragedy into blessing, bringing joy to people who want only to love a child, and a home to a child who aches for a parent to hold him or her.  And that is what happens, most of the time.  But sometimes, corruption enters into the equation.  Agencies take advantage of naive people, bilking them of thousands of dollars.  Unscrupulous agents and officials take advantage of poor and illiterate families in developing countries seeking to profit from their pain.  We don't like to think about these things.  No one who chooses to adopt expects corruption to touch their adoption.  With our hearts on the line and in a position of great vulnerability, prospective adoptive parents place their trust in glossy brochures and kind words spoken over the phone.  Even those with the best of intentions find it hard to get reliable information about these non-profit organizations that charge thousands of dollars to lead us through the adoption process.  The truth is, there are few regulations over adoption service providers - and many loopholes.  What can you do?

 

The answer?  Good Old Fashioned Research - on the internet.  Start by learning all you can about the country (or countries) you are considering adopting from.  Go beyond just finding it on a map.  Read news articles relating to the country - on all topics, not just adoption.  (Corruption tends to be endemic - if it's rampant in other areas, it's more likely to be found in the adoption process).  Join yahoo lists and other groups from the adoption community.  Ask a lot of questions.  And when you've narrowed your choices down to a few agencies, research them too.  Not just the agency, but the people behind the agency - the owner, president, country representative, as well as any staff they have in-country.  Oftentimes when an agency is shut down for bad business practices or corruption, they just move to another state and re-open under a new name.  (See In The Headlines for an example of one agency recently caught doing this).  If a country requires agencies to be licensed by them to facilitate adoptions, make certain they have already received that license - do not commit your heart and your money to an agency based on promises of a license to come.  That said, a license is not proof of ethical behavior.  It's just a start.  Ask questions, of your agency and any clients you "meet" on the lists.  Look for red flags.  Be willing to walk away if your gut tells you something's wrong.  The only loyalty you owe is to your family and your future child.

 

It sounds daunting and hard and overwhelming, and sometimes it is.  But

 in the end, when you look your child in their eyes and know in your heart that they came to you through an ethical process because they truly needed a family, it will all be worth it.